All My Thoughts Today Center Around One Thing...

In the case of strawberry banana flavored yogurt, banana always comes out the lesser party. This blatant bigotry is outrageous, as everyone knows banana is by far the more popular fruit anyway.

Last night I ate the most wonderful thing the world has ever seen, but it was in one of my dreams. I dreamed I was in a place reminiscent of the Reading Terminal Market, and at an ice cream stand was favored with culinary perfection: a banana, on a stick, dipped in marshmallow and rolled in coconut and chocolate chips, and finally smothered with peanut butter and chocolate drizzle. I am now alight with the fire to obtain this Dream Banana in waking life.

Midnight pizza does wonders for my subconscious cerebral awareness.

Have you ever played with those foam packing peanuts, enjoyed the airy squish of it beneath your fingers, and said to yourself they would be really fun to chew on if only they didn't taste like hand lotion and tree sap? I have. Imagine my delight, then, when I realized today that dried apples are of that precise texture.

How does SoBe make their lifewater so delicious without a single gram of sugar? I suspect witchcraft is involved.

The most disheartening bit of trivia I've learned this month is that Sun Chips are actually fattier than potato chips. What in the world are they good for?

"Fruit punch" is probably the most suspicious sounding name for a drink I know of. It's as bad as "brown sauce" and "food store." Exactly what fruit is in that stuff, Hi-C, that you aren't willing to specify, hm? Not even "orange drink" is as evasive.

You know what's the most unkind name for a movie genre ever? Spaghetti Western. It calls to mind all manner of fantastical visions regarding what such a name could mean, like a Western that comes with a complimentary plate of spaghetti, or wherein the characters fight using spaghetti instead of guns (as illustrated above, please click to zoom), or all the cast are noodles. Reality, however, is nothing so awe-inspiring--a Spaghetti Western is merely a Western made by Italian people. Which doesn't make any sense, because Italians never had a Wild Western era.