So, I've been thinking.I've been a very bad writer for the past yea months, in that I've hardly written anything at all. The problem is, I haven't really written consistently for about a year now, maybe more. Which means I'm rusty, which means everything I write is so inadequate and dull even I notice. Which means that I stop writing whenever I start (who doesn't know the frustration of trying to continue with something you're doing horribly at?). Which means I get more unpracticed. Which means I get more dreadful, which means I get more frustrated, which means I get more unpracticed, and so on.
Well, it's summer (for me, anyhow) now, so I want to break free from this rut. And I know how to do it--I have to knuckle down and start writing crap and just keep at it until it looks less ugly--but it's the actual carrying out of the solution that always stops me. Therefor, I'm toying with the idea of committing to write something--a sentence, a paragraph, a scene--just something creative every day (as much as is possible, because there's always vacations and Youthcamp and days where I'm just weak). Following that vein of thought, I'm toying with the idea of following in the footsteps of basically every creative friend I have and starting a writing blog.If I did start one, I'd be open--nay, rabid--for suggestions and prompts on what to write on, because I really can't just pull ideas out of my couch cushions. I'm also thinking I'd at least loosely use that "100 Themes" list that seems to be so super popular around the cybersphere these days as a potential framework for the project.
The process of thinking through this idea is extremely back-and-forth in my mind.On the one hand, having a blog that other people (potentially) would read might keep me more accountable than I would by my onesy; on the other hand, it may just mean that I have more people to throw pitchforks and full wine bottles at me during those long gaps of weakness and lack-of-posting than just my own brain. On the one hand, it would help me if I had people reading and critiquing my work as I went along so I could continue to improve; on the other hand, my creative psyche quails at the thought of subjecting you poor readers to some of the melodramatic, inane space-waste I have been known to and most likely will produce. On the one hand, the vain side of me has grand dreams of complete strangers reading my blog and thinking I'm the next...Marcus Zusak, and lavishing me with praise and book deals; on the other hand, the more practical side of me knows that will never happen and it's more likely that if it's read by strangers at all they'll glance over it, never read it again, and forget they ever heard of me; and then there's also my paranoid side that wants to make it sacrosanct so no one evil will steal my brilliant ideas; so the vain side and the paranoid side are at war and neither of them are speaking to the practical side because she's against both of them and is just mean to suggest that someone would think my literary prowess is less than the level of a god-Shakespeare.
You may be telling yourself I'm over-thinking this. If you are, are you surprised? You shouldn't be.
Thoughts? And I mean complete, helpful thoughts on the whole subject entirely, not just "Gawsh I love reading your stuff!" Don't just tell me to do it because you want me to write more (Ben). This isn't exclusively about me writing more.
[You'll notice I've broke the lovely repetitive format of my post titles. It's my blog, I can do whatever I want.]
Kill the paranoid side, Meg. Kill. It. You know all of us are going to read your writing, and will want to keep it sacrosanct so much so that, if not everyone else, I, will be looking for copycats and kill them personally. As for the vain side, all though vainness is sort of an evil, I think strangers /will/ read your writing. If not at first, then later. It's like being an actress. You have to go to thousands of auditions, most of the time being shut down by every casting director---but at least people know you're out there and acting (or in your case, writing). If no one auditioned, no one would know about the nobody. So in your case, if you don't do this writing blog, no one important will ever know you're writing.
ReplyDeleteMost importantly, I think you should trust God with this blog. Pray that strangers will notice it and not steal it, but read it and pass it on to other strangers who have editor friends who will read your writing and ask to put it in some fancy shmancy anthology. Trust and pray.
You DO need to write more, if only because an unused sword will rust. I think the blog is a good idea. It may not kick off overnight but I have confidence that the quality of your writing (especially as it improves through use and constructive criticism) will attract some form of attention of either quality or quantity. Besides, having a blog is almost like having a copyright, you can say "Hey! I posted this back when, so hands off1." I say go for it.
ReplyDeleteI have a hunch that what you call "the more practical side of me" is more like a little thing called the "reactionary proto-humble self-deprecating overhype" side that most creatives run to in attempting to avoid snobbishness. It lies to you as much as the vain side you speak of.
ReplyDeleteThere's definitely a way to acknowledge that you are good at something in an objective sense while still welcoming criticism and commentary. I think for the most part you do this. Or you should, because you are that talented. :P
There's always a fear that you will come across as overtly confident in your talent, but I think the fact that you are aware of it means you're good to go. It's kind of like (DEEP SIMILE ALERT) a fire: let it burn just enough to temper the clay of your presentation, but don't let it scorch it.
All this to say: the blog is a good idea. A great idea, actually, even if just for the practice, feedback, and (not gonna lie, this helps) the feel-good of the encouraging feedback of that once-in-a-while superbly-awesome post. And based on the usual quality of what you've been feeding us, there are bound to be quite a high percentage of this.
As for Scriptural encouragement - not only do I echo Hannah's final words, but I'd also like to point to Colossians 3:17 and the enigmatic Luke 16 Stewardship Parable. The latter has been especially helpful for me personally. It's worth a study. ;)
SUMMARY: Please blog. Will read.
((PS. I would love so badly to see you work through the 100!!!!!!!!!! <- exclamation points added for emphasis))
Hey there!
ReplyDeleteI saw a comment of yours on Joel Stickley's blog. :)
It's funny - we're kind of in the same boat, except that I hadn't written anything for ten years before this April. Ack. I also feel you on wanting some type of prompt. Do any of your friends write? My husband, two of his friends from work and I have been meeting up late on Wednesday nights, having a drink, and reading things we've written to each other. It's really inspiring, and very cool to hear other people's styles. Also, one of those people had the same thought - that she wanted to commit to writing something every day - so she asked everyone she knows on facebook for an idea, setting, problem, etc for a short story. I think she ended up writing nine, and having a lot of fun with it. ...I guess, other than that, I like to keep reading, and keep up with my dreams.
Anyway, those are just random thoughts from a total stranger. ;)
Your post was really amusing. I think you'll come out with great stuff - best of luck!
Ashley